So, I'm in AP art. Miss Lench does like my work, but I was talking to her about what scores high with the board and she said realism with lots of shading... Which is completely not my style. I'm freaking out, 'cause I want to stay true to myself, but I almost feel as if the board is telling me how good of an artist I am... I'm looking for some freaking validation, something that will tell me I am a good artist. I hear comments from friends and stuff, and I can never sort out when it's just a friend commenting and being nice, or when it's someone actually in love with my work. I feel so insignificant next to the amazing artists on DA and I really want to work in the art field, but when I think about the people on DA, the people I'm competing with, I know I won't get a job... so if I receive a good score from the college board,then maybe I'll feel confident enough to actually pursue a job in the art field. I don't know. T_T lol I guess I'm just bitching, but I'm just really insecure about my art. I really want to score well on my art portfolio so that I know for a fact that I'm not a failure at everything... for once, I'd like to actually be good at something, be the best at something... anything.

Wow did that spiral. Anyway... just ignore this journal. I just need to get more sleep and then maybe I won't think about this kind of stuff.

I TOTALLY JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE SEXIEST MAN ALIVE SINGS LIKE A GOD! GERARD BUTLER IS THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA! WHY DID I NOT KNOW THIS BEFORE?!?!?!?!?!

[link]

so, my mom works at hurley, and she really wants to be rated higher on the list of top michigan hospitals, so register, and vote (10 times) everyday for hurley and as a bonus you can win an xbox 360. lol

On top of that, I am sick.... I have a virus. At the band game I didn't feel well, I had a headache, and a lot of sinus and ear pressure. When I got home I took some motrin and it helped a bit, but that morning I didn't feel much better and so I did a nasal rinse thingy (not pleasant, but it helps), and it helped a freaking lot. (you really don't want to know why >.< ) but my virus is going away (I think) but I'm still not going to be able to sing in choir. (not that that's a big deal >.< )

but yeah. Check out the link!

1. Post the rules
2. Each tagged person must tell 8 things about themselves
3. At the end you have to tag 8 people and post their icons in your journal
4. Then go back to their page and leave a comment saying you tagged them
5. No tag backs

1. I'm the laziest person I know. I haven't filled out one college application T_T

2. I'm a terrible phone friend. T_T

3. I like to draw, but sometimes I get so impatient and I rush and therefore ruin the drawing, or get so fed up that I'm not up to par, (at least where I think I should be), that I stop drawing for months at a time.

4. I have no self esteem. lol

5. I hate j-rap, but j-pop makes me happy

6. I'm going to die this next school year... 3 AP classes >.<

7. I really love to read, but I hardly have time too T_T

8. I'm a boring person >.<

So I tag:


and anyone else who wants to do this^^

So I decided this is like a facebook quiz, and I had to do it. (I love facebook quizzes >.< )


.:FIRE:.

[ ] You have a short temper.
[x] You often act on your emotions without thinking first
[ ] You are very competitive.
[ ] You like to play with fire.
[x] You are not a strong swimmer or you can't swim at all. (I'm kinda pathetic at swimming >.< )
[ ] You prefer warm weather over cold weather.
[ ] You often lose control over yourself.
[ ] You can be quite reckless.
[ ] You sometimes hurt people without realizing it
[ ] People have often called you insane.
Total: 2

.:WATER:.

[x] You have a calm, laid-back personality.
[ ] You like to go to the beach.
[ ] You rarely get angry.
[x] When you do get angry, you know how to control it.
[ ] You think before you act. (hahaha. If I did think before, I would never act >.< )
[ ] You are good at breaking up fights. (I try... but I fail lol. people don't listen )
[ ] You are a good swimmer.
[x] You like the rain.
[x] You can stay calm in stressful situations.
[ ] You are very generous.
Total: 4

.:EARTH:.

[ ] You are physically strong.
[ ] You have a close connection with nature.
[ ] You don't mind getting dirty.
[x] You form strong opinions on issues that concern you.
[ ] You could easily survive in the wild.
[x] You care about the environment. (I care, but I don't do much about it. lol)
[x] You can easily focus on your work without getting distracted. (Nope. Any noise, and there goes my concentration )
[ ] You rarely get depressed. (I don't get depressed... just sad )
[ ] You aren't afraid of anything.
[ ] You prefer to have a strict set of rules.
Total: 3

.:AIR:.

[ ] You have a free spirit. (I worry too much that I'll upset people...)
[x] You hate rules.
[ ] You prefer to be out in the open rather than in small, enclosed spaces. (I don't really care lol)
[x] You hate to be restrained.
[x] You are very independent and outgoing.
[x] You are quite intelligent.
[x] You tend to be impatient.
[x] You are easily distracted.
[x] You can sometimes be hyperactive and/or annoying.
[x] You wish you could fly.
Total: 8

.: DARKNESS:.

[x] You spend most of your time alone.
[x] You prefer nighttime over daytime.
[ ] You like creepy things.
[ ] You like to play tricks on people.
[ ] Black is your favorite color.
[ ] You prefer the villains over the heroes in movies
[ ] You don't talk much. (It depends... if I'm with new people, I'm not talkative... but otherwise, people need earplugs )
[ ] You are atheist.
[ ] You don't mind watching scary movies.
[ ] You love to break the rules.
Total: 2

.:LIGHT:.

[x] You are very polite.
[x] You are spiritual.
[ ] When someone is in trouble, you never hesitate to help them.
[ ] You believe everything you see or hear.
[x] You are afraid of the dark. (Not afraid of the dark, but how it cripples one from knowing.)
[x] You hate violence.
[ ] You hope for world peace. hahaha
[x] You are generally a happy person.
[x] Everyone loves to be around you. (I think everyone but the people who have gotten on my bad side, which as Lindley pointed out every single day of drivers training, is quite a few people. It's not my fault that people love to pick on me for my height.. weight... my nerdiness.... lol Lindley is such a bitch! I used to like her... but she was the WORST person to be around in drivers training. THE ARGUING!!!! Oops. Went on a rant! lol )
[x] You always follow the rules.
Total: 7

Well, I guess I'm air, since it was the only one that came above 3 >.<